When we read sad books during times of sadness, people think we’re wallowing. Not entirely true. We wallow for about ten percent. Maybe fifteen. But more like ten.
A big thirty percent of sadness-reading is validation. It is fine to feel sad, the book says. It is normal, it says. I feel it, too, it says. And sometimes, mine is so much worse than yours, it says, that yours lightens up enough to bear.
And the rest? That other fifty-five-to-sixty? Puts words to our grief, our pain, our hurt, our darkness. The book can tell us how we feel, give us definition. The words can put wings to our sadness and help it fly up, just a little, so it hovers over our heads instead of smothering our hearts.
Not wallowing. Healing.
I completely agree! I have a certain book that I re-read every time I miss my dad. I have a good cry, and it always makes me feel better.
I love how you can put into words what I can’t about my own feelings. I’m not good with words.
I completely agree! I have a certain book that I re-read every time I miss my dad. I have a good cry, and it always makes me feel better.
I love how you can put into words what I can’t about my own feelings. I’m not good with words.
Amen.
And not just books. Blog posts too.
Amen.
And not just books. Blog posts too.
So true. Kinda like when you watch a weepy chick flick when you’re feeling down. It just helps you feel validated…better.
So true. Kinda like when you watch a weepy chick flick when you’re feeling down. It just helps you feel validated…better.
This is why I write tear jerkers. Sometimes you need to cry.
This is why I write tear jerkers. Sometimes you need to cry.
I agree. It feels good to read about someone with a similar experience. Not wallowing, but connecting.
I agree. It feels good to read about someone with a similar experience. Not wallowing, but connecting.
Oh, absolutely! That validation is so great.
Oh, absolutely! That validation is so great.