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Remember how I like my Kids?

December 8, 2010 by becca

I remember, too. And there are four of them, right? And I like them all in the same place at the same time, right? Cue the family song.

(Didn’t you know the family song? Oh, well, here you go: It’s the Rolling Stones’ “You Can’t Always Get What You Want,” sometimes known as “You Can’t Always Get What You Wa-hant.”)

But, see, I want to always get what I wa-hant.

And now, the world’s worst segue:

We don’t have a lot of family traditions in our home. Most of our traditions (the holiday food variety) revolve around Grandma’s house. Which is awesome. But I was worrying that I was giving the Kids a gyp childhood what with the lack of Wilhite Household Traditions when I had myself a little epiphany.

Just a little one.

We actually do have a couple of family traditions. If someone speaks or sings in Church, he or she chooses a dessert to make and eat that day. We have a turkey dinner every year for Superbowl Sunday (game optional). We have chocolate chip cookies for dinner every New Year’s Eve (the veg and protein parts get trotted out later). And the epiphany part?  Our best family tradition is that we eat dinner together.

All the time.

And we like it like that.

Y’all know I like food. A lot. And that I like to make it. Frequently. But did you know that the days we don’t eat dinner together, all of us around the old kitchen table (our first married furniture purchase), with plates and glasses and a knife for Husband no matter what we’re eating… Those not-together days are rare. And not so much fun.

Kid 1 closed her play (White Christmas, and she was lovely) on Monday night. We were there, all of us. From 5:00 to 10:00. Husband took cast photos. Kids 2, 3, and 4 sat in the theatre seats and watched warm-ups, mic checks, and a few diva tantrums (I’m not saying whose). And Kids 2, 3, and 4 chose the seats we’d watch the show in based on that scientific observation of where the most tissue-paper snow fell in previous shows. (They chose wisely. We were covered in the stuff.)

And now that the show is over, including really long days and pretty late nights, I am looking so, so forward to the idea reality of being back together around the kitchen table every night.

Except last night, when I stole Kid 1 away and took her Christmas shopping. While we were gone, Kids 2, 3, and 4 made Chicken Fried Rice for dinner – a big favorite (and why not, when it’s Renee’s recipe and is Just That Good?). Kid 1 and I drove down the canyon to The Town (but we stopped for shakes first, and yum). And here was my favorite part of a great night – when we made the first stop, she looked at the shop, a little startled, and said, grin spreading, “Oh. Are we Christmas shopping for me?”

I know. She’s cute. These 16-hour days at school have caused her to totally miss the fact that I’ve finished all my shopping, wrapping, and under-tree-placing, except for the stuff that’s hers. Which I can’t buy without her, because she needs to wear it. You know.

So we shopped. This isn’t something we do very often, as I think we’ve discussed before. We’re not big consumers. But it was SO FUN just to hang out with her. Teenage girls are completely underrated. She is adorable, charming, and really great company. We bought books. At two different shops. We tried on shoes. We checked ourselves out in the magic mirror at Nordstrom’s.We went to Ally Condie’s launch at the Provo Library. We moseyed. Moseying is another thing that is totally underrated. We listened to funny music. We talked. We laughed.

I’ve missed that.

So here’s a new plan – the Wilhites are reclaiming the Dinner Together tradition, and holding on tight. Because that’s what I really wa-hant.

And “if you try sometimes, you just might find you get what you need.”

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(26) Comments for this blog

  1. Melanie Jacobson
    December 8, 2010

    I love dinner together. And I’ll take your word for it that I’ll like the teenage girl thing. If mine’s like yours, then I’ll look forward to it.

  2. Melanie Jacobson
    December 8, 2010

    I love dinner together. And I’ll take your word for it that I’ll like the teenage girl thing. If mine’s like yours, then I’ll look forward to it.

  3. Cynthia Mauer
    December 8, 2010

    I love mommy/daughter shopping days! So I bought the books you recommended… Where the Mountain Meets the Moon and Matched. I still need to find one for Maddy. She doesn’t love to sit and read, so it has to grab her attention. She loved the Twilight series and Hunger Games. I’m not looking for depth, more entertainment to convince her that reading is a good thing. Any suggestions?

  4. Cynthia Mauer
    December 8, 2010

    I love mommy/daughter shopping days! So I bought the books you recommended… Where the Mountain Meets the Moon and Matched. I still need to find one for Maddy. She doesn’t love to sit and read, so it has to grab her attention. She loved the Twilight series and Hunger Games. I’m not looking for depth, more entertainment to convince her that reading is a good thing. Any suggestions?

  5. December 8, 2010

    I think your traditions sound like the best kind– simple, frequent, enjoyed by all. And I’m a fan of moseying; we should all do more of it, don’t you think?

  6. December 8, 2010

    I think your traditions sound like the best kind– simple, frequent, enjoyed by all. And I’m a fan of moseying; we should all do more of it, don’t you think?

  7. December 8, 2010

    I’m feeling a powerful desire to mosey right now. And to wake up one of my daughter’s and take her shopping. I’m easily influenced like that.

    I like your traditions. Simple, sweet, and so, so heart filling. The very best kind.

  8. December 8, 2010

    I’m feeling a powerful desire to mosey right now. And to wake up one of my daughter’s and take her shopping. I’m easily influenced like that.

    I like your traditions. Simple, sweet, and so, so heart filling. The very best kind.

  9. LeNell
    December 8, 2010

    The play was wonderful, J did so great, I loved her hair, her dancing, and yes we got covered in snow also. What a supportive family you are! The play put us in the Christmas Spirit.

  10. LeNell
    December 8, 2010

    The play was wonderful, J did so great, I loved her hair, her dancing, and yes we got covered in snow also. What a supportive family you are! The play put us in the Christmas Spirit.

  11. December 9, 2010

    Have you any idea how much I adore you? Everything that mom’s should be, everything that women should be, everything that’s just made of happy–this is you. So happy for Kid 1 and her play, for your own family togetherness, and for the joy this post is made of. *hugs*

  12. December 9, 2010

    Have you any idea how much I adore you? Everything that mom’s should be, everything that women should be, everything that’s just made of happy–this is you. So happy for Kid 1 and her play, for your own family togetherness, and for the joy this post is made of. *hugs*

  13. December 9, 2010

    I love family traditions. I google new ones all the time, because you’d be surprised how short of time it takes to start a new one. Before you know it, the whole family feels like you’ve “done it forever”. And all those folks out there that gave me warnings about “when I have teenagers”…I don’t understand the warning. I have totally enjoyed my teenagers! They are thoroughly delightful, witty, bighearted and fun. We moved recently and I miss my 20 year old and how he shared all the “funnies” he ran into while watching the Office or perusing the web.

  14. December 9, 2010

    I love family traditions. I google new ones all the time, because you’d be surprised how short of time it takes to start a new one. Before you know it, the whole family feels like you’ve “done it forever”. And all those folks out there that gave me warnings about “when I have teenagers”…I don’t understand the warning. I have totally enjoyed my teenagers! They are thoroughly delightful, witty, bighearted and fun. We moved recently and I miss my 20 year old and how he shared all the “funnies” he ran into while watching the Office or perusing the web.

  15. December 9, 2010

    Your blog is adorable! You’re gorgeous, I love the photos!

    So here I am, hopping from blog to blog, the usual and I come across your name and click on the button to see where it leads me… and sure enough you pop up. Your blog takes me by hold and then I look to the left and what do I see???

    BOOKS I HAVE YET TO READ!!!

    I love meeting authors! So… an official hello is in order *waves* hello! I’m going to be searching for your books and buying them because the covers alone have me intrigued!!! Yay! More books for the TBR list! This is seriously my favorite find of the day!

    Now that I’ve written you a novel for a comment, I’ll leave you with this: Family traditions rock and though I don’t have many I love the one’s my family and I have.

  16. December 9, 2010

    Your blog is adorable! You’re gorgeous, I love the photos!

    So here I am, hopping from blog to blog, the usual and I come across your name and click on the button to see where it leads me… and sure enough you pop up. Your blog takes me by hold and then I look to the left and what do I see???

    BOOKS I HAVE YET TO READ!!!

    I love meeting authors! So… an official hello is in order *waves* hello! I’m going to be searching for your books and buying them because the covers alone have me intrigued!!! Yay! More books for the TBR list! This is seriously my favorite find of the day!

    Now that I’ve written you a novel for a comment, I’ll leave you with this: Family traditions rock and though I don’t have many I love the one’s my family and I have.

  17. Erin
    December 9, 2010

    We don’t eat at the table nearly enough. It’s usually in the living room in front of the t.v. Horrible I know. Now on the occasions that we do eat at the table,According to Myles, “We’re eating at the kitchen table like a family.” HA

  18. Erin
    December 9, 2010

    We don’t eat at the table nearly enough. It’s usually in the living room in front of the t.v. Horrible I know. Now on the occasions that we do eat at the table,According to Myles, “We’re eating at the kitchen table like a family.” HA

  19. December 11, 2010

    You’re giving your kids a wonderful childhood, you silly, silly mommy. The eating dinner together thing? Priceless. Two of my four are away at school, and child #3 often works during meal times. So it’s just numero dos and his two, laser beam focused parents. Oh, well, that’s what he gets for being born last, huh?

    (I’m NOT trying to send traffic to my blog, but my last post talks about this really neat “Return to Family” project that encourages families to eat dinner together and generally spend time together. Go look at her site when you get a minute; you’ll see what an awesome mom you really are.)

  20. December 11, 2010

    You’re giving your kids a wonderful childhood, you silly, silly mommy. The eating dinner together thing? Priceless. Two of my four are away at school, and child #3 often works during meal times. So it’s just numero dos and his two, laser beam focused parents. Oh, well, that’s what he gets for being born last, huh?

    (I’m NOT trying to send traffic to my blog, but my last post talks about this really neat “Return to Family” project that encourages families to eat dinner together and generally spend time together. Go look at her site when you get a minute; you’ll see what an awesome mom you really are.)

  21. December 11, 2010

    Numero cuatro. Kid number 4. That’s who gets laser beamed at dinner time. No idea where ‘dos’ came from. Time to un-blog and go cook dinner for the missionaries. Yep. I’m that righteous.

  22. December 11, 2010

    Numero cuatro. Kid number 4. That’s who gets laser beamed at dinner time. No idea where ‘dos’ came from. Time to un-blog and go cook dinner for the missionaries. Yep. I’m that righteous.

  23. December 12, 2010

    Love it. I agree, teenage girls are highly underrated.

  24. December 12, 2010

    Love it. I agree, teenage girls are highly underrated.

  25. December 12, 2010

    That eating together tradition trupms so many other ones. Sounds like you are on track!

  26. December 12, 2010

    That eating together tradition trupms so many other ones. Sounds like you are on track!

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