I recently had occasion to tell this story to my Very Good Friend, A. I thought it would be an excellent way for you to waste a few minutes. You’re welcome.
Many years ago, my little family moved to Indianapolis. That is in Indiana. See, there’s a clue in the name. (So many times, people asked if Indianapolis was in Minnesota. How funny. Ha. Or sad.) So there we were, in our “new” house for the first week. It was a cute house, on a lot with HUGE trees in the back yard (one of the best reasons to live in Indiana – that and the fireflies). Then – it was the next Sunday – we went to church. As we usually do. This is a good practice, either in Indiana or elsewhere. We were gone for a little more than four hours, all told. When we came home, two tired adults, two hungry toddlers, we saw something strange. There was water on the garage floor. Near the door leading to the house. I know, right? Weird.
The we walked inside, and ha-ha, it was raining from the light fixture in the ceiling. No kidding. Awesomeness. So Husband ran upstairs (*splash, splat, splash*) and found that little hose? The one that connects the toilet to the wall? Was unconnected. And spraying gallons of water all over the upstairs master bathroom. Including behind the HUGE (10-foot long) mirror that thankfully was anchored to the wall studs, not the now-wet-tissue consistency drywall. The hose was, in my memory, writhing around, whipping jets of water hither and yon. (It may be important to note that I didn’t actually go upstairs and see the water show. It’s just in my memory anyway.)
So Husband turned the water off. (There’s a sort of faucet right there on the wall behind the toilet, just in case this ever happens to you and you need to locate it. Turn to the left. You’re welcome.) He went to the grocery store to rent a wet vac. (Cheers for Indiana, where there is at least a Kroger grocery store open on Sundays.) To save the upholstery, I started moving furniture out to the back yard. See, the ceiling was dripping here and there. On a whim, I moved my small Kid 1 and my smaller Kid 2 out to the back yard, too. I put them on the now-outside couch with a snack and a book. I believe that was two minutes before the family room ceiling, now weighing something in the neighborhood of thirty thousand pounds, came schlumping to the living room floor.
It was pure awesome. No kidding. I was standing in the doorway that led to the back yard, and managed not to utter any bad words. Then I put on my game face and started lugging chunks of wet drywall outside.
This kind of thing, the lugging and the restraining-from-cursing, lasted the better part of a week, during which time we recognized the serious blessing of good (comprehensive and local) homeowner’s insurance. And we had the greatest two Horsemen of the Apocalypse (the Flood and Fire guys) doing all manner of restoration, fanning, drywalling, painting, and carpet repair. Small Kid 2, who had a serious fascination with workmen of all kinds – she stood in the front-room window seat every Tuesday and cheered for the garbage man – was in almost-two-year-old heaven.
We moved a little more than a year later. The move had nothing to do with the possible lingering smell.
(That was a joke, in case anyone who moved in to that house subsequently happens to be reading.)
I just thought you might like to take a little stroll down memory lane with me.
Good times.
(18) Comments for this blog
So glad you have such a funny and positive way of retelling the past….I think maybe you should work that into one of you books! Hey! Maybe you could come up with a comical retelling of the time that Marc and I went to an institute dance, a month before we got married, and I came home looking like Quasimodo (sp)… Good times…
So glad you have such a funny and positive way of retelling the past….I think maybe you should work that into one of you books! Hey! Maybe you could come up with a comical retelling of the time that Marc and I went to an institute dance, a month before we got married, and I came home looking like Quasimodo (sp)… Good times…
Yikes! That is awesome! I wish I remembered it!
Hey – aren’t you supposed to be in class? XO
Yikes! That is awesome! I wish I remembered it!
Hey – aren’t you supposed to be in class? XO
This reminds me so much of our famous 8 week move to Idaho. That’s right, 8 weeks. We literally packed everything (a family of 6) into a 16′ Budget truck, drove to Idaho Falls without knowing at all where we were going to live, got a motel room, and found a home to rent. 3 weeks in, I break my leg ice skating. Yep. There’s nothing like laying in bed for 5 weeks in a white room with only white outside (snow, snow and more snow, and we were used to balmy southern Utah). My 2006 blog archives give the account if you have the time to scan it. There’s some pretty funny potato jokes you might like 🙂 pollysdoodles.blogspot.com (P.S. Do you know what it’s like to beep going through security at the airport because of the rod in your leg and be sent to the search cubicle…which is, of course, completely made of glass. I felt like a criminal!)
This reminds me so much of our famous 8 week move to Idaho. That’s right, 8 weeks. We literally packed everything (a family of 6) into a 16′ Budget truck, drove to Idaho Falls without knowing at all where we were going to live, got a motel room, and found a home to rent. 3 weeks in, I break my leg ice skating. Yep. There’s nothing like laying in bed for 5 weeks in a white room with only white outside (snow, snow and more snow, and we were used to balmy southern Utah). My 2006 blog archives give the account if you have the time to scan it. There’s some pretty funny potato jokes you might like 🙂 pollysdoodles.blogspot.com (P.S. Do you know what it’s like to beep going through security at the airport because of the rod in your leg and be sent to the search cubicle…which is, of course, completely made of glass. I felt like a criminal!)
OH my gosh! That would be so awful! I’m glad the two-year-old loved it though. It would be quite a sight to see.
OH my gosh! That would be so awful! I’m glad the two-year-old loved it though. It would be quite a sight to see.
Only you would think to set your kids up outside with a BOOK in the middle of a house disaster. And a good thing you did. I know, that was the worst grammar ever.
Only you would think to set your kids up outside with a BOOK in the middle of a house disaster. And a good thing you did. I know, that was the worst grammar ever.
Oh, how I love your voice!
Oh, how I love your voice!
I can’t believe you didn’t say bad words.
I can’t believe you didn’t say bad words.
Oh, believe it, Mel. That was when I was young and pure. No kidding.
Oh, believe it, Mel. That was when I was young and pure. No kidding.