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Patience

September 17, 2010 by becca

Once I had it.

Then I lost it.

Not forever, you know.

But, temporarily lost it.

Once I listened
When they said, “Mom.mom.mom.mom.”

Once I asked, “Can you tell me that again,
so I really understand?”

Once I wanted, really wanted
to know about the day.
The friends.
The classes.
The trauma-drama.
The giggles.
The boy.
The tears.
How the mud got on the jeans.

I’ll want that again.

But maybe not today.

Once, listening to the music practice made me glad.

Not so much today.

Once the requests were met with, “Sure.”
“Help yourself.”
“No problem.”
“It’s my pleasure.”

Today? More likely, “Seriously?”
“Who do you think you’re talking to?”
“You’re killing me, Smalls.”

And it’s not just with them.
It has disappeared with myself, too.
I have no more patience for low word counts.
Slow revisions.
Missed obligations.
Belated action.
Dusty bookshelves.
Piles of clean clothes growing dirty again before they’re folded.

It’s time for a day off.
A day without the need for patience.
No patience required.

Ah. I need it.

(And I’m getting it. I think.

Details will follow.)

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(5) Comments for this blog

  1. September 17, 2010

    Been there, too! Taking a day off really helps you appreciate every other day.

  2. September 17, 2010

    You totally just wrote my day. Becca, you are one of the single greatest women alive. I’m just sayin’. Cuz it’s just true.

  3. September 17, 2010

    You know, I’ve needed a little less of this now that my kids have gotten older. But bizarrely, I need more of it with other people, especially folks in my ward. I sometimes wonder if my kids’ demands on my emotional reserves helped keep me from being totally bugged by everyone else in the universe!

    Upon this, I must ponder. (And I’m with you; reeeally, reeeally need a vacation right now.)

  4. LeNell
    September 18, 2010

    Wow, you should be a writer………

  5. September 19, 2010

    Oh my yes…that’s exactly how it was and is and will be. Hope you’re enjoying some down time.

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